Abstract Notions

I read an article this month in Vogue, of all places, about a NY artist named Dana Schutz. The article struck me because of one quote in particular. Dana, a painter, was speaking about her painting, "Presentation" (above;) she said, "Painting it was really fun, all the way through. It was all the things I wanted to paint." This hit home because it was a reminder for me of what aligns me with painting, and how much fulfillment I get out of the process. The experience, for me, of making the painting, laying on the paint, mixing the colors, touching the brush to the canvas, watching the paint drip, laying on the second and third washes, seeing the painting culminate its own atmosphere, seeing the subjects realized within the color fields, seeing shapes surface, informing me of what to do next...
all of these moments happen for me during the making of the painting, and when the painting is finished-when it all stops-I often times feel more connected to the memory of painting it than I do to the product of the painting itself. And right now, I'm struggling because I'm longing to feel this connection happen in my studio, but my studio time is very limited. The woes of having a day job: a working life, and then also a painting life.